My First ME Post!
So I’m derping around on the computer, supposed to be working but whatever. Found this awesome website called hyperbole and a half. This chick is super funny. But my favorite part so far is how she made up her own pain chart for the doctors office.
0: Hi. I am not experiencing any pain at all. I don’t know why I’m even here.
1: I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.
2: I probably just need a Band Aid.
3: This is distressing. I don’t want this to be happening to me at all.
4: My pain is not fucking around.
5: Why is this happening to me??
6: Ow. Okay, my pain is super legit now.
7: I see Jesus coming for me and I’m scared.
8: I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain. I might actually be dying. Please help.
9: I am almost definitely dying.
10: I am actively being mauled by a bear.
11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.
Too Serious For Numbers: You probably have ebola. It appears that you may also be suffering from Stigmata and/or pinkeye.
I think we’re gonna post this on the wall of our home as a guide for our children to rate their pain.
xheartxfeltx-deactivated2012122 asked: TAG. YOU’RE IT. The rules are to state 10 random facts about yourself. Then, go to your ten favourite blogs and tell them that they are it!
WHAT SORCERY IS THIS!!!! You know I can’t resist talking about myself! why do you do this to me!
!. I was born in the city of Safed, Isreal.
2. We immigrated here when I was a teenager. I am a citizen now.
3. I am 7th of 12 children.
4. I speak 3 languages.
5. I was only a few months out of law school when I helped the woman who would become my wife get our children.
6. I play World of Warcraft like it’s a religion.
7. My Wife is teaching me to play the guitar.
8. I cannot cook, not even to save my own life.
9. The thought of being a father still scares the poo out of me, but it is one of my favorite jobs.
10. My Wife and I scare strangers in public when we start getting really sarcastic at each other. People think were getting ready to fight.
Would you like to play a game?
Anonymous asked: honestly, i'm only following you because of your wife! :)
Oh so she makes you do things against your will too?
The Message My Wife Left Me
Guess what husband…youre still married to me! mwhahahaha I own you!!!! And half of everything you earn! MWHAHAHA
An Appreciation Post for my Husband #13.
MY HUSBAND: “I read a funny E-card today.”
ME: “Oh yeah, what made this one special?”
MY HUSBAND: “It reminded me that if you give birth to our child without a c-sec, Its face will be rubbing against the inside of your vag.
MY HUSBAND: “…”
ME: “Cesarian Section it is!”